


All The Way In

by hunters_retreat



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Dean doesn't go to Purgatory, M/M, Mistaken for Being in a Relationship, No one believes they are brothers, Post-Leviathan
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-27
Updated: 2015-09-27
Packaged: 2018-04-23 16:48:23
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 13,691
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4884313
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hunters_retreat/pseuds/hunters_retreat
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sam never did know how exactly it happened.  One day, he and Dean were run ragged, exhausted from yet another disaster of a hunt, no money and no gas, no prospects and no allies left alive to give them a hand.  The next, they owned a store with a shooting range and Sam was a professor of religious studies at a local community college.</p>
            </blockquote>





	All The Way In

 

Sam never did know how exactly it happened.  One day, he and Dean were run ragged, exhausted from yet another disaster of a hunt, no money and no gas, no prospects and no allies left alive to give them a hand.  The next, they owned a store with a shooting range and Sam was a professor of religious studies at a local community college.

They’d just finished a hunt in California and they’d been too tired to get far from the scene.  Dean had gotten over his fear of Sam leaving him for Stanford and California had fewer nasty memories than most states so they slept for two days in a grungy motel room, taking turns picking up food before they fell back in bed until the next time someone’s stomach woke them.

On the third day, they emerged together.  They ate at a small diner and stared out the window, trying to find something to talk about that wasn’t a hunt, friends long gone, or their tragic past.  Even stories of their childhood brought up painful memories and neither was strong enough to face it yet; too many years of running from the inhuman and impossible.  It was Dean who finally smiled, pointing to the store across the street.

The sign was worn around the edges but just needed a fresh coat of paint.  Winchester Western Wear stared out across the street at them and Sam laughed.  It had a slightly hysterical edge to it, but Dean didn’t say anything.  Sam refrained from mentioning the edge to Dean’s in return.

They strolled across after lunch, checking out the store for a few laughs.  It was all they had at that moment, inside jokes about how to wear your sombrero and the best boots to wear if you were gonna walk through streets filled with horse-shit.

Half an hour later, Sam was staring at the empty air above the car as Dean slid into the driver’s seat.  A simple “It’s for sale,” from Dean that left Sam wondering what Dean was thinking.

Two weeks later they were the new owners of a western gear shop.

Four years later and they had a nice set up; a western shop with a shooting range out back and Sam had a steady gig as a teacher.  They lived a good life, quiet and uneventful and just about perfect.  They had a house they rented outside of town on a stretch of land that gave them the privacy they both craved.

“Hey Sammy, you ready to close up?”

Sam turned around as he finished locking the back door of the store.  Dean was looking at Sam with a smile wide as Texas.  It was a look Sam was getting used to every day.  Dean was like a child some days, playful and more giddy than he’d ever been as a kid.  It was infectious.  Dean always had been, truth be told, be it his good or bad moods.  Sam had always hung his hat on Dean’s whims  
and it was never more obvious than now as they lived out their retirement.

“Yeah.  Everything good back there?”

The shooting range had been Dean’s idea.  They bought the vacant land behind them when Dean pointed out that selling weapons and opening a range would give them a way to keep their skills honed without anyone wondering about it.  It’d also given them a great way to remain in the know of the supernatural world without getting their hands dirty.  No one could ever replace the Roadhouse or Bobby’s well stocked library, but Sam and Dean did their best to keep an eye out for hunts to pass along to the next generation and to introduce them to working professionals who knew the truth.

“Jody is finishing up with Alan.  She said she’d lock up and drop the keys off in the morning,” Dean answered as he walked away from the office.  They had an indoor and outdoor range and Sheriff Jody Mills still made the trek every so often to check in.  She doted on Dean without seeming to and Dean preened under her no-nonsense attention.  Sam wasn’t exactly neglected himself.

She was only in town a few days though and she was mixing business and pleasure this time, introducing a hunter she knew to Sam and Dean while they passed on information for a hunt they’d been working on.  She was one of the few people they trusted and Sam wasn’t surprised Dean was willing to let her close up.

“Anything we need to be worried about?” Sam asked, even though he knew it wasn’t since Dean was steering them towards the impala.

“Nothing they don’t have handled.  Jody knows to call on us though if she needs help.”  Dean opened the front door and slid into the seat.  Sam stared back at Winchester’s Western Wear and couldn’t help but smile.  He never would have thought they’d live long enough that Dean would want to settle down, but Sam loved his life.

“Hurry up, Professor.  I’m starving.”

Sam shook his head at his brother but there was still a smile on his lips when he settled into the impala beside Dean.  Dean must have been thinking the same thing as Sam because when he looked at his brother, Dean had a wide grin as well.

 

**

“Don’t forget that you have your paper topic due next class.  One page, size 12 font – no cheating with the margins – on the effect of the rise of Christianity on other world religions.  Just remember to keep it basic guys.  I want to know that you’ve thought out the topic but when you get deeper into your research I know it’s likely to change somewhat.”

Dean stood just inside the back of the lecture hall watching his brother at the front of the room.  Sam was dressed in simple jeans and a brown Henley shirt with a darker suit jacket thrown on top.  Sam looked the part of college professor and there had been a warm light in Sam’s eyes since he’d found a way to forge his credentials and gotten the job.  Sam loved to teach and Dean loved that Sam was finally getting to do something he was passionate about.

Even if Sam hadn’t actually gotten a college degree, he was damn good at teaching and Dean could see the way the students listened to him.  When the lights went up and Sam was done with his class, the kids filed out of the large lecture hall.  A handful of young hopefuls stood close to the podium at the front to get a few minutes of Sam’s time.  His brother gave it freely, only occasionally seeming to realize that some of his students were less than interested in the subject at hand, and more interesting in getting Sam’s attention.

Fifteen minutes after class was over and Sam was finally talking to the last girl.  She smiled at Sam and the way she crossed her arms in front of her gave Sam a clear shot of her cleavage.

“Mr. Winchester.”

Dean never failed to laugh over that because really?  Mr. Winchester?  It sounded like someone old and cranky who should be sitting behind a desk shoveling shit for some corporate douchebag.  It definitely wasn’t his brother.

“I was hoping I could talk to you for a few minutes about last week’s lecture.  I had a few questions.”

Sam seemed to realize it was a set up because his eyes darted around the room for an out.  When he saw Dean his lips turned up in a smile that wasn’t relief, just acknowledgement of the affection that ran between them.  It was a second later that relief came and he turned back to the girl.

“I’m sorry, but I’ve got a lunch date.  I’ll be in my office Tuesday morning before class for my regular office hours if you still have questions.”

Sam grabbed his bag from the table that was sitting beside the podium and walked towards Dean without looking back.  Dean almost felt bad for the girl, except for that fact that Sam’s history with partners generally meant they were slated for a horrific death and she didn’t deserve that just for wanted to get into Sam’s pants.

“Lunch date?” Dean teased as he and Sam walked out of the room together.

“What?  You didn’t come to have lunch with me?”

“I did, but you think anyone would believe I’m dating your pathetic ass?”

Sam leaned in to reach the handle of the door and laughed slightly.  “Everyone thinks you’re dating me Dean.  In fact, if you ask at the store we’re closeted lovers who have been targeted by hate crimes in the past so we own a shit load of guns so it can never happen again.”

Dean shook his head as he moved past Sam.  “Annie really needs to get a better hobby than making up rumors about us.”

It wasn’t entirely untrue though.  Not that he was dating Sam, but that people believed it.  Two men with the same last name who worked together, lived together, and owned a business together?  Two men who tended to eat off each other’s plates and gave each other only minimal personal space and who became extremely focused on the other when someone new tried to come into their lives?  No one believed they were brothers so they came to the next conclusion.  And since they lived in California and people were a little crazy the next conclusion was that Dean and Sam were closeted lovers.

“It’s better than the time she was telling everyone we were CIA spies who had left the company when we were sent to kill each other and fell madly in love instead.”

“I kinda thought that was one of her better ones.”

Sam laughed as he pushed Dean towards the car.  “You would.”

**

“Sam, we got someone up front that wants to see you.”

Annie was staring across his desk with a small frown on her lips.  He didn’t know who it was out front but it was obvious that she was worried about him and Sam gave her his best smile.  Annie’s rumors about his relationship with Dean were fun enough that Sam never bothered to try to stop her but there were times when she was clear enough that she believed the part about Sam and Dean being lovers.  It was a bit embarrassing at times because he and Dean fought like an old married couple and with their lives they’d learned to hurt each other deeply.  It wasn’t odd to find Sam or Dean sacked out on the cot in the office every few weeks.  Hell, they bought the damn cot because it happened so often.

Even having a house and their own rooms, sometimes it wasn’t enough to have just a door or wall between them.  Sometimes it felt like a damn continent wasn’t enough space between them and on those nights one of them inevitably ended up at the store.  In the morning, shooting off a few rounds in the range soothed a lot of the tension and they were normally able to function well enough to keep the store running.  At least until they dragged themselves out to some deserted side of the road and could take out their anger and frustration by sparring.  They usually hurled their worst insults there and by the end, they were both black and blue and maybe even bloody before they called it quits and settled back into the easy intimacy they’d always had in the front seat of the impala.

The look Annie was shooting him now was normally reserved for mornings she found one of them on the cot.  Annie had been married and divorced three times and she swore she knew exactly what led to each breakdown.  She also said she was gonna burn the cot because that was one of their downfalls.  No matter how many times Sam explained they weren’t lovers though she didn’t believe him.  And Sam couldn’t explain to her everything they’d been through, everything they’d done for one another, to let her know that there was no way Sam or Dean would ever walk out on the other.

“Wanna tell me who it is?”  He didn’t have a lot of time for unexpected visitors today but Dean was out on the range giving a lesson and he couldn’t be disturbed.  Damn, he’d hoped to get his papers graded today so he could pass them back to his students next week.

“Detective Baker.”

Sam’s brow raised and he bit back a smile.  Alright, so that was why Annie was upset. She was convinced that Detective Baker was trying to break Dean and Sam up.  Sam was pretty sure Detective Baker – _Alex, please_ – believed the rumors about Sam and Dean and was trying to do just that.  Sam had no interest in the guy, and even if he did he knew better than try something like that so close to home.  Sam and Dean both had their flings, but they made sure to head out of their local area to get them.  Besides, a Winchester dating a cop was just begging for disaster.  It was bad enough that they had so many cops in the range for extra practice, but Dean’s reputation as a marksman had spread pretty quick and he was a great teacher.  Sam knew that from experience.  His colleagues at the college were very complementary about his own style of teaching but it had all come from the example his big brother had given him.

“Alright, I’m coming.  Why don’t you go back and see if you can get Dean’s attention.  See if he wants to say hi to Alex.”

Funnier than Alex’s attempts at getting Sam to realize he was hitting on him – no, Sam was not a moron and he did notice it.  He noticed the students too, though Dean thought he was oblivious to that also – were Dean’s reactions to Alex hitting on Sam.  Dean decided right off the bat that Sam could do better than Alex and he did everything he could to dissuade Alex from continuing.  Including living up to some of Annie’s rumors.

Sam might be a bit of a masochist but it was worth the bit of regret to feel Dean’s hands on his hips or on the back of his neck as he smiled at Sam, calling him baby boy in a perversion of the words he’d spoken when Sam was still a child and Dean his protector.  
He walked into the store and was surprised to see Alex in uniform.  The cops normally came by when they were off duty and seeing Alex there on a professional visit made Sam squirm a little.  They’d given up the hunting life when they settled in San Jose four years ago but that didn’t mean something couldn’t come back and bite them in the ass.  It didn’t mean that no one might find out his credentials were fake and start looking into the history of one Sam Winchester.

It had been a risk when they decided to settle down for good, but they didn’t want to hide who they were and with a little help from a few friends – it paid to have friends in the FBI who knew the truth – they were able to wipe their records clean.  If someone went for the paper trail though, that was a different story.

“Detective, what can I do for you today?” Sam addressed the officer as he stepped up behind the counter and made sure he had a casual smile on his face.

Alex was pulling something out of his pocket and Sam let his eyes roam over the store quickly to see if anyone else was there.  It was a slow day – the middle of the week generally was in the store - but Sam felt a sense of pride in the business he owned.  It might have been spur of the moment when they decided to buy the shop and more than a little whimsical considering their own adventures in the world of the real west, but the store was good for them.

The store had a large selection of western clothes and an even wider selection of boots and hats.  Dean had taken to wearing one most of the time and Sam loved it.  It always brought back the moment when Sam had walked out into the sunlight and seen his brother in an honest to god western showdown.

Boys had been making heroes out of western sheriffs since the West had been won and Sam was no different; that moment had thrown him immediately back to the days where Dean had been his hero and he’d worshipped the ground he walked.  It had taken Sam a long time to get over it and there were times Sam wasn’t sure he’d ever actually succeeded.

It wasn’t his fault that Dean was badass, no matter what time period he was in.

Alex placed a small plastic bag on the counter and Sam brought his attention back to the other man, waiting for an explanation.  
“I need some information about some archaic markings.  When I called around, you seem to be the local expert.  There was a murder and we don’t have any other leads.”

Sam went to grab the bag with the bullet in it and Alex placed his hand over Sam’s. “I’m sorry to bring something so gruesome to you Sam, but I need to know if you can tell me anything about the markings on the bullet.”

Sam almost laughed but Alex’s frown was sincere.  He really was bothered that he was about to show Sam a bullet that had been part of a murder case.  It was a little refreshing to have someone – besides Dean – trying to protect him but the guy had no idea who Sam really was and he never would.  It was no fault of his own though and Sam bit back his smile as he pulled his hand and the bag away from Alex’s grip.

“Hey Sammy, we gonna work on that order or – oh, hey Alex.  How are you?”

Dean walked in like he didn’t know Alex was there and Sam had to smile at his brother’s entrance.  They actually did have an order they were going to go through when Dean’s lesson was done but that wasn’t why Dean was there.

“Hey Dean, how are you?” Alex asked, coming up and offering his hand to Dean.  Dean shook it with a smile, then stepped behind Sam and placed his hand on the small of his back.  Dean was really good at screaming _mine_ without actually opening his mouth.  Sometimes it bothered Sam, but with Alex it was a necessary evil.

“Good.  I just managed to beat my top score so it’s been an awesome day.  Are you here to shoot off a few rounds?”

Sam barely kept from rolling his eyes at Dean.  “He’s here on business, not pleasure.”

“Too bad.  I’m on a roll today.  I could use a little competition.”

Alex gave Dean a tight lipped smile.  They all knew Alex wasn’t in Dean’s league on his best day and Dean’s worst.  “Sorry but I needed some of Sam’s professional help.”

“Anything I can help with?”

“His help with archaic markings,” Alex said, turning his eyes back to Sam in a dismissive gesture.

Sam would be offended for his brother but when Dean turned his back to Alex and leaned against the counter, his lips were turned up in a smile.  Sam bit the inside of his lip to keep from laughing at his brother’s jovial mood.

Instead he pulled the bag up and finally got a look at the bullet.  Something minute must have shown in his eyes because Dean turned his attention to the bullet in Sam’s hand.

He knew the bullets.  He knew them because he and Dean had been the ones marking the casings with the designs.  They’d been made specifically to go in the Colt, a weapon they’d lost in the war to stop the apocalypse.  The last time Sam had seen it, the Colt had been with Lucifer.

Dean didn’t say anything but when Sam looked up at him, his eyes said _what the hell_ clean enough.

“The... uh … the markings are protective holy symbols.”

“Handmade,” Dean added as he looked back to the bag.  “They’re crudely drawn, probably someone with a good knife but definitely not factory made.”

“You know about this sort of thing?” Alex asked, surprised by Dean’s addition to the conversation.

“I know my bullets.  And you don’t get to be around Sam long without learning a thing or two about the archaic.”  It was a line they’d used before when Dean spouted off about something that was supposed to be Sam’s expertize.

“Any way to track this sort of thing?  I can’t say much, but a guy was killed at close range with this bullet and there was no sign of a break in.  The killer knew him and waited until he had his guard down, then killed him.”

“I can make a few calls,” Sam said softly.  “See if anyone has seen this particular marking used like that.”

Dean nodded.  “Yeah.  I can do the same.  There might be someone who’s seen it around.”

Alex looked between them and nodded.  “You know how to find me, Sam.  I appreciate the help, whether you find anything or not.”  
Alex smiled at Sam, before he gave Dean a nod and walked out of the store, taking the bullet with him.

“That was a bullet for the Colt,” Sam said softly, unable to keep it in any longer.

“How the hell did he end up with it?  And what the hell is a demon doing in the area?”

Sam shrugged but he knew Dean didn’t like coincidences any more than he did.

“Hope your hacker skills are still intact, Sam.  I think we need to get a look at the police report.”

Sam didn’t answer, but when Annie came up from the back they asked her to take over for the day.

**  
The drive home usually calmed Dean’s nerves but not today.  The idea of a demon being that close to them sent him into the sort of all-encompassing fear that he hadn’t lived with in years.  No matter that Sam was bigger or stronger than Dean, he was always going to be Dean’s little brother and he needed to protect Sam.  Having a demon close by made Dean’s skin crawl and what else would someone be using the Colt on?

Sam had already called Jody as they were driving to see if she knew of any hunters in the area or if she’d heard word about the Colt but there was a no on both so Sam had just closed the phone and adopted the tight lipped frown and brow furrow that had disappeared about the same time as Dean’s fears.

When they arrived home, Dean stopped the car in front of the ranch style house.  There was a wrap-around porch that led to a large barbeque in back with a big yard that allowed them the privacy they craved.  The place was far bigger than they needed, but Dean had fallen in love with the yard and Sam went crazy about having a room to use as an office.

They’d rarely had different bedrooms growing up so Dean wasn’t sure how they needed that many rooms but in the end it had all turned out good.  Truth be told, they normally fell asleep watching television together in whoever’s room.  It never failed to happen; as soon as one of them took off to hit the hay the other followed and bad sitcoms ensued.

Sam got out of the impala as soon as she stopped moving but Dean got out slower, taking his time to look up at their home, at the life they’d built really.  After everything they’d been through, Dean enjoyed living the simple life.  Sure, some days the monotony got to him, but the tradeoff was never having to worry if Sam was hurt, never having to sew another stitch into his brother’s body, and never having to fall asleep and wonder what was coming after them in the morning.  They were getting pulled back into a hunt though and Dean couldn’t help but worry about that.

“Dean?” Sam was at the front door, looking back at Dean like he’d just realized Dean wasn’t at his side.

“Yeah, I’m coming,” he answered as he closed the impala.  When Sam led them into the house, Dean took the quiet comfort it offered before he dropped his jacket onto the nearest chair and followed Sam up into his office.

“Order take-out tonight?” Dean offered.

Sam’s computer booted up quickly and now that Sam had his fingers on the keyboard he seemed to be able to focus again.  “Um, yeah.  Probably a good idea.”

“Chinese or pizza?”

“How about the Mexican place on the corner?”

“Got it.”  Dean didn’t ask what Sam wanted because he already knew.  Instead he headed down and grabbed for the phone to get dinner ordered.  It was early for it, but they both knew they’d eat whenever they got around to it and it was better to order before they forgot.

Sam didn’t disappoint and by the time Dean was done ordering, his little brother had managed to hack into the police database.  The crime scene reports were printing out for them and they were both waiting for it.  Dean hated when Sam got to see it first, wanted to be able to read it at the same time to see if their thoughts aligned on the hunt.

“How the hell is this coming back around now?” Dean asked into the silence.

“I wish I knew.  I mean, what’s the likelihood of another hunter coming this close to us and not coming to see us?  And I haven’t seen any demonic signs either.”

“Not that these lower level demons give off the same as Lucifer, but the guy was keeping it on the lowdown if we didn’t have anything.”

“I don’t like this at all, Dean.”

“I know, Sam.  We’ll figure it out though.  We always do.”

**

There was still police tape around the place but at night it was easy enough to get past.  The victim, Don Terrence, was a guest speaker on the healthy living circuit and he had only been home a few days before he was killed by a bullet from the Colt.  They’d seen the pictures of the crime scene and of the man with a bullet right between the eyes but there was nothing like being at the scene of the crime to get a feel for it.

“You think the cops missed something?” Sam asked although he already knew what Dean thought of cops in general.

“They just don’t know what to look for, Sammy,” Dean said as he moved from one room to the next.

Sam followed, not entirely sure what Dean was looking for either.  As much as Dean hated cops, he would have made a damn fine one if their lives had turned out different.  He’d mentioned it a time or two after they settled in San Jose but Dean scoffed at the idea of going through the academy and having to go by the book after a lifetime of running from the law.

Dean took a few steps into the office and stopped before backtracking and crouching down on the floor.  When he pulled up the rug there was a delicate line on the carpet that continued on in a square shape.

“I’ll be damned,” Sam said softly.

“Like I said, they just don’t know what to look for.”

It didn’t take any time to clear the space and get the door pulled open.  Dean went down first with his gun drawn and ready, Sam at his back.  The steps were steep and it was a longer flight than Sam had suspected it would be.

It was quiet and years of working in the dark had taught them the difference between natural and unnatural silence.  There was no one waiting in the dark corners for them but Sam kept his gun up just in case he was losing his touch.  Dean found a light switch and gave Sam a quick heads up before he turned it on.  Sam closed his eyes against the brightness but it wasn’t as bright as he’d expected.  He could still see without the negative afterimage it would have created if it was any brighter.

“Huh,” Dean said softly.

Sam took a look around the room.  “Huh,” he mirrored his brother.

It wasn’t a basement or workout room or even a secret chamber to keep little old women chained to the wall for his own personal deviance.  It was a work room.  A hunter’s work room.

“What the hell?”

Dean’s confusion was clear and Sam couldn’t help but shake his head as he looked around.  There was a desk opposite Sam but the connecting wall was one big corkboard where different maps were pinned up.  Under each map were newspaper clippings, handwritten notes, and police reports neatly pinned up to frame the details of each hunt.

“He’s a hunter?” Dean asked as they looked around.  It didn’t make sense and the idea that the guy was a hunter threw out the idea of demon possession.  “Who would waste the Colt on a hunter?” Dean asked.

Sam ignored Dean’s insensitivity about a man being murdered because he understood what Dean was saying.  Any bullet could have killed Don Terrence.  Why would someone use one of the Colt’s rare bullets?  Even if you knew how to replicate them, they were a bitch to deal with and Sam couldn’t imagine wasting them like that.

“I think we need to do a little more digging on Mr. Terrence.”

Sam moved to the desk to get to the laptop that was sitting there and Dean tucked his gun into the back of his jeans to start looking at the hunts that were posted on the wall.

An hour later and they had an idea.  It wasn’t a great idea and Sam felt himself reeling slightly at the possible implications.

“So he travelled on this healthy nut circuit and tracked down hunts in the area when he wasn’t lecturing?” Dean asked.

“Yeah.”

“So then he goes off and starts killing hunters?”

The guy’s contact list on the computer had a number of names crossed through and when they’d started dialing it’d turned up the same.  The four names crossed off were all dead.  The fifth name was still alive and kicking but he had suspicions about what was happening and those led Sam and Dean to their next conclusion.

“So he was possessed by a demon.  Killed off his buddies while on the health food circuit.”

“Yeah.”

“Didn’t I tell you healthy living could kill you?”

Sam hated the way his lips pulled up at the corner even as he tried to keep from laughing.  Five people were dead and they still had no idea who had killed the hunter, if his possession was part of something bigger, or where the Colt was.  It wasn’t the time for tasteless jokes, but if they waited for an appropriate moment, Sam figured he’d never actually hear his brother speak again.

He sorta liked Dean’s voice so he wasn’t about to shut him up.  Not yet anyway.

“This looks messy, Dean,” Sam said instead.  “You think this is one we should hand off?”

“You tell me, Sam. Can you pass this one on?”

“No.  I just … it’s been a few years and I kinda got used to being safe.”

Dean gave him his best smirk.  “Nothing’s gonna happen to you, Sammy, not with me around.”

Even after all these years – all the failures and lies that had laid their relationship to waste and the years of rebuilding – it was still reassuring.

**

So, a hunter, Dean thought as they drove back to their home.  Sam was staring out the side window, fingers rasping softly over the stretch of old denim on his knee.  Sam's train of thought wasn't hard to follow.  A hunter, possessed and used to kill other hunters?  Been there, done that, didn’t want the damn tee shirt because Dean had gotten the bullet.

"Sam?" Sam didn't say anything.  "Hey, you wanna fill me in on what's happening up there?”  It had been a long time since they'd kept secrets from one another but Dean could feel Sam's angst without having to see it in his face.

Sam shook his head and waved his hand towards the dash.  "A possessed hunter killing other hunters?  With the Colt?  Sounds a little familiar, doesn't it?"

"Sam we haven't heard from Meg since the fight with the Leviathan and if she was gunning for us it sure as hell wouldn't be like this.  She'd come straight for our heads.  Besides, we don't know if it was a human or demon that used the Colt.  Could be another hunter was lucky enough to find the Colt after Lucifer went into the pit and decided to take out a demon that was killing good hunters."

"Yeah, I know it could be, Dean.  Just ... when have we ever had that sort of luck?”

Dean let out a short snort at that.  "Not saying we shouldn't look into it, Sammy.  I’m just saying it _could_ be nothing though."

Sam sighed and Dean suddenly wanted it to be more than that because he really wanted to salt and burn someone's ass for making Sam look like that.  It'd taken a couple years to get Sam's once permanent frown to disappear and Dean hated the way their simple recon trip had brought it back so completely.

When they were kids, all it had taken to make everything all right in Sam's world was a smile from his big brother, maybe a hug on the rough days, but they were long past the days when Dean had the power to take away the pain.  It wasn't stubbed toes and teasing anymore though, but a bloody history of pain and betrayal both in Hell and on Earth.

Not long after they'd set up the shooting range some of the local cops had come in, wanting to blow off a little steam.  They were good guys and Sam and Dean both took a liking to them.  Pretty soon they were all out there shooting together, showing off their marksmanship.  When it was all done Dean started cleaning up while Sam walked them out.

"We'll see you Sunday then?"

The guy was nice enough and his question was genuine.  They were a churchgoing group and they had made more than one comment about Sam and Dean joining them.

Dean had snorted at the comment and turned his back to the others to hide his reaction to anything else they might say.  "You don't believe in God?" The guy asked.  "Because I gotta tell you, I believe in him and his Angels.  Sometimes you see something and you’ve just gotta believe."

Sam's voice was hard when he answered, brooking no further discussion.  "Dean and I don’t doubt the existence of God or his angels.  And that’s exactly why we don't go."

Sam and Dean's faith was in something different these days.  Years ago, he'd prayed to an angel.  His brother had prayed to God.  For all their efforts and good deeds their father was still dead, Sam had lost his beautiful Jess, and they’d both been to hell.  They'd been played and the only thing worth having faith in anymore was each other.  Azazel, Hell, demon deals, Michael, Lucifer, Eve, Fucking Dick Roman, and every creature between had taught Dean that the only one in the whole fucking universe that had his back was Sam.  And Sam had learned that Dean had his.

Sometimes it was good to remind him of that though.  "We'll figure it out.  We might be a little rusty but we ain't dead."

Sam looked at him then, a small smirk on his lips.  It'd been a while since Dean had seen that particular look and it made Sam look like more than some part time college professor or store owner; it made Sam look dangerous and cunning, like someone who knew how to handle himself and could deal with anything thrown at him.   This was the little brother he knew.  It riled up something in Dean's stomach to see it and he couldn't help but smile back at it.

"Looks like we've got work to do."

**

“This is ridiculous, Dean,” Sam yelled at his brother as they ran around the corner of the building.  The sun was high in the sky but it was only a small inconvenience to the vampires that were chasing them.  Sam turned the corner and took another shot, hitting one of the vamps in the shin, causing him to fall.  It wouldn’t kill him but it made it damn near impossible to walk and he needed to slow them down.

Dean loaded the crossbow again but it was the last arrow they had.  All of Don Terrence’s research had shown a small nest of vampires but that wasn’t what Sam and Dean had walked in on.

They thought they were just retracing the guy’s last few hunts to see if they could pinpoint where and when he’d been possessed or how the Colt became involved but they’d come up blank.  Until they found the nest of vampires that hadn’t been taken out yet.

Now Sam was cursing Detective Alex Baker for showing him the damn bullet and he was cursing his brother for talking him into going to the vampire’s nest without checking it out first.  They never would have trusted someone else’s intel four years ago and it was a mistake he’d never make again.

Sam took another shot to keep the others back and then Dean was taking the corner and using the last of their dead man’s blood on the lead vampire.  Sam didn’t need to be told to make a break for it then and Sam barely took a moment to see that the rest were huddled around their injured before he was jumping over the hood of the car – Dean could kick his ass later for smearing blood over it; right after he stopped yelling at Sam for getting his thigh sliced open too – and sliding into the passenger seat.

They were gone a minute later and Sam watched out the rear window for signs of pursuit.

“We still got the hex bags?”  Dean asked.

Sam nodded.  “We should probably get supplies for fresh ones, but they should do for now.”

Dean drove on without another comment, both of them too aware of what was going to be coming for them.

It was full dark before Dean finally pulled over.  With the hex bags the vampires wouldn’t be able to follow them but they wanted as much distance between them and any chance of accidental discovery.

Dean went in to get them a room and Sam just sat back, waiting for his brother.  It was only a few minutes and Sam let his eyes close for a minute.  It was strange to be back on a hunt after four years and he hated how alive he felt the last few days, like the life he’d been living was just some sort of dream that he needed to wake up from.

He startled up in his seat when Dean knocked on the window. Instead of a teasing smile, Dean frowned as he looked over the parking lot and Sam knew he was worried about what could have snuck up on Sam while he was waiting.  Sam sighed because he knew Dean was just being overprotective but that had always been true and Sam had always humored Dean anyway.

Besides, Dean’s overprotective streak had always made Sam feel comforted; loved.

Dean didn’t say anything as they took their bags and moved them into their room.  When the bags were dropped though Dean pulled out the first aid kit and Sam stripped down to his boxers and tee shirt so Dean could get to the wound on his thigh.

“Damn it, Sam, couldn’t you move a little quicker?” Dean demanded as he started to work on Sam’s leg.  It didn’t need stitches but the time in the car hadn’t done his injury any good.  They’d needed the miles between them and the vampires though and Sam knew he’d be good in a few days either way.

“I’ll remember that next time it’s between my thigh and your back.”

Sam had a nice little scar on his back, right where Dean’s would have been if Sam hadn’t moved.  Dean had gone to hell for that scar and Sam wasn’t willing to see a new mark on his brother’s body.

Dean didn’t bring his eyes away from Sam’s thigh as he continued to clean it and Sam just took a deep breath.  He reached over and felt the bottle on the bed where Dean had dropped it.  It wasn’t really the pain Sam needed to get away from, but the proximity of his brother.  They were stuck in the room tonight though with just the hex bags they had though so Sam took a long pull on the bottle to help settle his nerves.

It’d been four long years since they’d had to share space like this and Sam’s need to keep Dean even closer hadn’t dissipated at all in that time.  They whole ‘feeling alive’ bit was kinda depressing because it made him remember too many small moments between him and his big brother, moments where Dean’s mouth was too close to Sam’s, where his hand was almost where Sam wanted it, moments Sam had wasted or gracefully saved himself from depending on what Sam’s mood was when he was remembering it.

This ache for Dean had always been there, this need to be everything for Dean.  He hadn’t understood how twisted it was when he was younger but it never went away even after he’d started to realize how wrong it was.  Even four years at Stanford with Jess – and god how he’d loved her – hadn’t changed his most basic desires.  Wanting Dean was like sight for Sam; he could live without it but the world was dark and full of shadows without his brother to light the way.

“Come on Sammy, you’ve had worse than this.” Dean’s voice was gravel thick, making Sam close his eyes against the rush of it.  
There was a time when Sam used to think it wasn’t just him.  After Dad had died and Sam had finally managed to get his brother back, he’d thought they might find their way together, figure out how they could be brothers and whatever else ran so thick through their veins.

It was slow and gradual, but then Sam had died and Dean had sold his soul and there were a lot of years and a lot of fucked up moments with too little trust to make it work.  Now, they were just brothers and Sam skirted the line of inappropriate every time he laughed at Annie’s jokes and tried not to choke on the longing.

“Been a long time since I had this,” Sam said, hand waving in the air so Dean would think he meant the injury and the shitty motel room instead of his brother’s hand on his thigh with only a small bit of fabric between them.

It was the third time he’d taken a pull from the bottle and it was apparently the last because he didn’t remember falling asleep.  He did remember a vague wrestling match as Dean put him to bed, Sam trying to get his brother to curl up with him but Dean’s determined stoicism beat Sam’s drunken grabby hands every time and Sam ended up curled up on his stomach with a hint of ache where his brother had tended his wounds.  Sam didn’t know if it was pain or his brother’s touch but he fell asleep remembering a horrible room at a bed and breakfast when the world had been full of grief and he’d lost another moment to his brother’s inability to see what Sam really needed from him.

 

**

 

 “Why do you even still have those, Dean?” Sam demanded as Dean came back from the vending machine.  
  
Dean shook his head.  Figured Sam would think it was all good to head into a hunt but forget the rest of the lifestyle.  “What, did you think you could just pay up, Professor?  Think you could just use your own credit cards?  We have a life in San Jose Sam and I’m not messing it up for your conscience.”  
  
“What?”  
  
“There is no trail leading us from San Jose to where we are now.  Maybe you didn’t think about what we’d need to do to keep our noses clean over the last four years but I was always afraid this would happen so I did think about it.  We need to keep Sam and Dean Winchester as far away from suspicion as possible and that means not using our credit cards two states over.  It also means you need to call in sick so no one wonders where you are for your classes tomorrow.”  
  
Sam’s eyes were open wide and his mouth was hanging open.  Dean knew Sam hadn’t prepared for something like this but Dean never wanted to relive those months when Dean had been on the straight and narrow and hoping to hell nothing tracked back to Lisa and Ben.  He made sure after that to always have an out even if he and Sam were now on the up and up.  He got it, he really did.  Sam had never liked being on the wrong side of the law – hell the kid left home to go be a lawyer – but after a while on the road he’d understood the need.  He was just … naïve wasn’t the word for it really.  Hopeful?  Unrealistically optimistic?  
  
Dean turned away from Sam as he grabbed for his own phone and walked out of the room, letting the early night’s breeze cool him off after the heat of the afternoon.  It would be dark soon and they were still heading down the road to Don Terrence’s latest hunts.  Two vampires had come at them the night before but they’d taken their heads before heading out of town quicker than they’d planned.  Dean figured it was the last of the nest that was gonna come for them, but he was still being vigilant.  The hex bags had been replaced but that didn’t stop good old fashioned leg work and chance from screwing them over.  
  
The door closed behind him but through the window he heard Sam grabbing his phone and making the calls he needed to.  Dean dialed a quick number and was pleased to hear it pick up after the first ring.  
  
“Winchester Western Wear and Assless chaps.  This is Annie.  How can I help you today?”  
  
Dean burst out laughing before he could stop himself.  “Annie, we’ve had this conversation before.”  
  
“Right.  If Sam calls, deny that you ever taught me anything and pretend I was ruffied by that nice police detective and am therefore not responsible for what I am saying.”  
  
“What would I do without you, Annie?”  
  
“Have mind blowing sex behind the counter where customers could just walk up and see because no one would be able to watch the shop and you and Sam would have to cover it yourself.”  
  
“Annie…”  
  
“Yeah, yeah.  I know.  Brothers.”  
  
He could hear the air quotes around the word brothers without being there with her.  He loved the woman so much he sometimes felt the need to strangle her.  She was honest and smart and trustworthy, handled herself well in a jam, and loved the Winchester brothers to a fault.  She’d been working in the store before Sam and Dean had bought it; running it for the old owners after her twin sister’s kid had been diagnosed with autism and she’d wanted to move back home to be with her and the nephew she adored but who needed more support than a single mom could give.  Even though her nephew was a teenager now, she still stayed in the picture and she was happy enough to stay on with Sam and Dean.  
  
“Listen, Sam isn’t feeling well and I feel strange about leaving him like this.  Think you can handle things at the store for a few days?”  
  
“Oh, of course hon.  Why didn’t you say something first.  Here I am flirting away while your boy needs you.”  
  
“Annie, he’s not gonna die.  He just has a fever and I want to stay with him, alright?  You call me if you need anything though.”  
  
“Right.  You just take care of your Sam.”  
  
He let out a deep breath at the ‘your Sam’ part but shook his head to let go of it.  “I mean it.  I’m feeling a little jumpy right now, so if anything feels off or strange, even if you just need to tell me about some creepy customer, you call me.  Promise me.”  
  
“Yeah, Dean.  I promise.  You take care and let me be.  I have a store to run.”  
  
She hung up before Dean could say anything else.  There were a few people that thought maybe Sam and Dean had been military at some point and they played into that more than anything, letting people think he was a little paranoid.  If it meant people called him when something odd happened just so he heard it straight from them instead of flipping out from a second hand retelling – that had actually been fun to act out.  Sam had played the part perfectly.  Damn kid could have been an actor, the way he’d profusely apologized to Dean for hiding some ‘weird customer’  in front of the whole store full of people – it also meant that Sam and Dean were pretty sure they’d know it if anyone or anything came looking for the Winchester boys.  
  
When Dean turned back into the room Sam was just setting his phone down.  He looked up at Dean and gave a small smile, not an apology exactly but it was something.  
  
“Taken care of.  I told them I’d be out this week and I’d call before next week to let them know if I was feeling well enough to teach class.  Annie got everything covered?”  
  
“Don’t know why Roy and Doris didn’t just sell her the damn place.  She doesn’t need us there.”  
  
Sam smiled at that.  “Yeah.  What’d you tell her?”  
  
“You have a fever and I didn’t want to leave you.”  
  
“Yeah, that’s not feeding her imagination.”  
  
“She answered Winchester Western Wear and Assless chaps.  I don’t think I need to feed her imagination.  What are the odds that she’s actually running a Chippendale show with cowboy themed strippers when we aren’t there?”  
  
“You’ve thought about that too much, haven’t you?”  
  
“It’s Annie.”  
  
Sam laughed then and Dean felt the weight on his chest lighten up.  
  
“Dean.”  
  
He looked up at Sam as he pocketed his phone.  
  
“I’m sorry.  About earlier.  You were right.  I didn’t think about what would happen to us when we hit the road again.  I know you’re not – you just do what you have to do.  I just forgot what it was like to live on stolen cards and hustling.”  
  
“It wasn’t all bad, Sam.”  Dean said as he sat on the bed across from Sam.  There was something in Sam’s eyes, something Dean wasn’t sure he should explore but something had been bothering Sam since the night they’d fled from the vampires and Dean was tired of second guessing himself.  It wasn’t what he thought it was – couldn’t be what he thought it was –and he was tired of wondering if it was something that was gonna blow up in his face.  
  
“No, it wasn’t,” Sam said softly as he leaned forward and let his hands fall between his knees.  His head was down, looking into his palms like he was a fortune teller and could read something there.  “I used to-“  
  
Sam stopped talking and Dean held his breath, waiting.  This was it.  Whatever had been bothering Sam, somehow it was finally coming out and Dean wanted to sprint out the room or drag it out of his brother in equal measure.  
  
“I missed this, you know?  Not the credit card fraud, but being in each other’s space all the time.  I know it was hard but … it’s different now.  I just always thought…”  
  
“What?”  
  
Sam snorted as he brought his hands up and ran them through his hair.  “Guess I just thought things would end up differently.”  
  
“You mean, you thought we’d be dead long before now?  Yeah, I always thought that too.  Always thought I’d die young and you’d get back to that degree of yours.  Guess this worked out better for both of us though.”  Dean smiled as he said it but Sam wasn’t looking at him and he knew Sam still needed to get something out.  
  
“No, I mean … us.  I thought we’d be different.”  
  
“Different how?”  
  
Sam let out a deep breath.  “Annie different?”  
  
It sounded like a question but it felt more like a mac truck in Dean’s chest. “Excuse me?”  
  
Sam was up and off the bed then, pacing the room like a goddamn tiger in a zoo.  
  
“It doesn’t matter.  I shouldn’t have-”  
  
“Oh hell no.  You don’t get to say shit like that and say it doesn’t matter.  What the hell did you mean by that?” Dean demanded, even as he was willing himself to shut the hell up.  
  
Sam stopped and his eyes pleaded with Dean for something Dean didn’t know how to give.  He couldn’t read Sam in this, his own repressed emotions rising up at just the right moment to bite him in the ass.  
  
“Dean, I … “ Sam stammered again but he kept his eye contact with Dean and Dean bit his lip to keep from saying anything that would stop whatever Sam was about to confess to.  “you were fucking everything.  I wanted … I left because I wanted things that … Jesus, Dean.  Do you really not get it?”  
  
“Sammy,” his voice broke as he said his brother’s name but that was nothing on the look in Sam’s eyes.  “Sammy, I don’t … I don’t know what you want.”  
  
Sam was moving then and all Dean could do was watch as Sam closed the distance between them.  He stopped just short of Dean, watered eyes staring down at Dean as he tried to get control of himself.  Panic reared up in Dean because damn it he’d let too many moments slip between them, always fearful that he’d misread his brother, and here Sam was being so fucking brave but holding off at the last minute because Dean wasn’t man enough to say the words himself.  
  
He grabbed the back of Sam’s neck and pulled him close, not hesitating as his lips slid across his brother’s.  
  
Sam’s arms wrapped around him like an iron vice and Dean didn’t think he’d ever felt anything better as he let Sam push him back slightly into the wall.  Dean opened for Sam then, let his brother’s tongue slip into his mouth and moaned for it, for more, for anything Sam would give him after all this time waiting for some sign.  
  
He felt Sam’s hand drop to his waist and Dean fisted Sam’s shirt in one hand and got his fingers twined good in his hair with the other.  Sam was mapping out his mouth like it was the way to the fountain of youth and this was his one chance to chart it.  He knew – of all the people in Sam’s life he knew – how intense his brother could be but this was startling and confusing and so damn hot he was gonna die from it.  
  
He pulled back a second later, Sam’s whine as he tried to chase Dean’s lips escaping before he could stop himself.  
  
“Baby boy, wait,” he whispered without thought.  
  
He watched the way Sam swallowed hard, his breath harsh and ragged and matching Dean’s almost perfectly.  “This can’t happen, Sammy.”  
  
When Sam tried to get free, tried to stand up straight and out of his arms, Dean just held on tight.  “Sam, stop.  Just listen.  This is a hunt, Sam.  A fucking hunt.  I can’t forget where we are.  I won’t lose focus like that and risk hurting you and if you take this any further Sam I’m not gonna come up for days.  Got it?”  
  
Sam finally looked Dean in the eyes and Dean took a deep breath.  “We just give this a little space, alright?”  
  
“And then what?  What happens when this hunt is over, Dean?”  
  
“Then we go home and figure this out.  I’m not gonna talk about it now when we need to stay on top of this, but Sam just think about it.  This can’t be … I’m …” he took a deep breath because he knew he couldn’t say any of the things he wanted to say to reassure his brother.  Instead he just nodded to Sam.  “When we get home, I’m all in.   When we get home, you tell me where we stand.”  
  
Sam looked like he wanted to say something right then and there but he nodded slowly before leaning in again, telegraphic his movements plainly for Dean.  “Alright, when we get home we’ll talk.”  He pressed his lips against Dean’s and Dean let Sam lead the kiss for a few minutes before he finally pulled back.  
  
Sam walked away then, heading towards the bathroom.  
  
“Sam?”  
  
“Need a cold shower,” Sam said before slamming the door between them.  
  
Dean let out a slightly hysterical laugh before he stripped down to his boxers and turned out the lights just like he would any other night.  He couldn’t sleep and knew he wouldn’t for a while, not with the taste of Sam still on his tongue and the uncertainty of what was happening between them.  
  
Things had been good the last four years and Dean almost regretted what had happened tonight.  If it screwed up what they had now, he’d never forgive himself, but Sam wanted him and Dean had thought all chance of that had fled when he’d come back from Hell and everything had come out – Sam’s relationship with Ruby, the apocalypse, and Dean’s own deeds in Hell.  He just might have a chance at something more though and there was no way Dean could push back his own desire when Sam was feeling it too.  
  
He kept his breathing steady when Sam came out of the bathroom and didn’t say anything when he felt the bed dip behind him.  Sam’s movements were sure and steady and Dean wondered again at his brother’s bravery.  
  
“Sammy?”  
  
Sam curled up behind him, making Dean the little spoon in this arrangement.  Dean might bitch about it, but it meant he was still between Sam and the door so he ignored the part of him that was trying to remind all parties that he was not a small spoon.  
  
“Just sleep, Dean.  I miss hearing you breathe.  Just wanna feel it again,” he said, his chest pressed to Dean’s back and one arm wrapped around Dean’s hip so his hand could rest on Dean’s stomach.  
  
“You’re not the only one,” Dean said, offering what reassurance he actually could.  “I used to fall asleep with you in my arms and hated it when you got too big.  Haven’t slept a good night since.”  
  
He could feel Sam’s smile as his brother pressed his lips to the back of Dean’s neck.  He didn’t say anything, and Dean pointedly ignored the growing ache between his legs as Sam rubbed circles into his abdomen.  As turned on as he was, as uncertain as everything was between them, it still didn’t take him long to fall asleep.  
  
**  
  
Sam woke up with a start, aware of two extra bodies in the room.  A flash of memories - the burn of a bullet and knowing Dean was right behind him – made Sam bolt upright but Dean’s hand was there almost as soon as he moved and Sam realized where he was and who was there.  
  
“Yeah, always knew it was a queen,” the younger hunter said with a smirk towards his companion who was still standing by the door.  
  
“Great, now if you’re ready to stop courting a bullet, can we get back to work here?”  
  
It took Sam a minute to figure out who they were but Dean had apparently put it together quicker.  Either that or Dean had been in contact with them since Sam had last seen the brothers.  
  
“Michael, what the hell are you doing here?”  
  
“Asher and I were driving through to a hunt and saw the impala.  Knew it had to be you so I figured I’d see if we were heading in the same direction.”  
  
“And the wakeup call?” Dean asked as he got out of bed and headed towards the bathroom.  
  
“Just keeping you on your toes old man.”  
  
Dean flipped him off as he closed the door.  Asher threw Michael a fond smile, but dipped his head down as if Sam wouldn’t know the affection that ran between them.  Asher and Michael weren’t so different than Sam and Dean except that they’d been able to stay out of the hunt until they were both old enough to actually drink and they’d had Dean and Sam to contact once they did.  
Michael turned to look at Sam though, pointedly eyeing the perfectly made up bed beside him before looking back to the bed Dean and Sam had shared.  His eyes lit up and he smirked all too much like Dean for Sam’s comfort.  
  
“So.”  
  
“Shut up, Michael.”  Sam groused as he grabbed for his duffle.  
  
The brothers laughed in unison and Sam went to the bathroom and started banging on the door.  “Let me in Dean or I swear to god I’ll kill one of them.”  
  
The door opened and Michael and Asher were still laughing.  
  
**  
  
“So how’d you catch this one?” Dean asked as soon as the waitress dropped off their food.  Dean and the boys tucked into the daily special while Sam enjoyed the first piping hot bite of his omelet.  
  
“Ballard.  You remember her, right?  She knew a hunter that got killed.  He’d talked to her the night before about meeting up with a friend and we checked it out for her.  Turned out to be a lot of dead hunters.  We started trying to track it.”  Michael looked at Asher and his little brother shook his head as he raised the orange juice to his lips.  
  
“Because it wasn’t hard enough to be a hunter without that.  Awesome.”  
  
Dean rolled his eyes but Sam barely kept a smile from crossing his lips.  He had never been so comfortable with the hunt at their age, but he remembered a time when bantering like that with Dean had been the most soothing part of his life.  
  
He didn’t know if it was pathetic that it still was or just awesome.  
  
“How about you two?  I didn’t think we’d get you out of San Jose in this lifetime,” Michael asked.  
  
Sam fielded the question when Dean tried to talk around a mouthful of pancakes.  
  
“A friend is a cop and he brought a bullet for me to see.  It was from the Colt we told you about.  We started trying to find the gun and found ourselves in this mess.”  
  
“So we’re looking for a demon that is possessing and killing hunters and demons alike with a gun made by Samuel Colt.  No one said life was boring as a hunter,” Asher said.  
  
Sam looked down and he knew he wasn’t the only one feeling guilty about the way Asher and Michael were living their lives.  They could have had healthy, happy lives if he and Dean had somehow been able to keep the shtriga from getting to them.  Dean kicked Sam’s foot with his lightly and Sam looked over at him to see a small, sad smile on his lips.  
  
Sam was distracted for a moment by Dean’s lips and the memory of how they felt, but he pushed that out of his mind as he realized Dean was trying to offer comfort to Sam and take the full responsibility of that himself.  
  
“Hey, stop it,” Asher said as he and Michael glared between them.  “this is the life we chose.  I know you guys feel responsible but it wasn’t you.  You saved our lives and gave us somewhere to turn when we needed it.  The shtriga wasn’t your fault.  He chose me and he marked me.  Once he touched me, I was a walking target for the things that go bump so this isn’t your fault.”  
  
Sam didn’t care what Michael or Asher said.  He knew that his father and brother had failed to kill the shtriga because of him, which meant what it did the next cycle was his fault.  They had saved Michael and Asher that day, but they’d set them on a path that he and Dean had hoped to never do.  
  
“Look, we’re all here.  You can go on alone or we can help you,” Michael said, breaking the tension between them.  “You got any ideas on this one?”  
  
Sam nodded.  “There was a demon.  She went by the name of Meg.  She did something similar before, possessing a hunter and killed others with his body.  She’s a nasty bitch that’s managed to survive all these years.  It’s got to be her.”  
  
“Alright, lets get her then.”  
  
Asher’s confidence was infectious and soon he and Dean were heading out to the car while Sam got the bill and Michael wrapped up his brother’s left overs to eat on the road.  
  
Sam was almost around the corner to the car when he heard Dean and Asher talking.  
  
“Look, Dean, it isn’t perfect, but this is the life I chose.  I know you didn’t have the same choice.  We might not be best friends or anything, but Michael and I do our research before we take up with other hunters.  Your story is all out there because of your dad.  I just don’t want you to feel guilty for something you didn’t do.  And even if you still feel like you have to take credit for it, I don’t think of this life as bad.  I like being a hunter.  I like being a hero and being able to make a difference in people’s lives.  Sure, it’s sucky hours and worse pay, but I’m with Michael and we’re helping people.”  
  
Dean didn’t say anything and Sam decided it was a good time to interrupt.  Besides, he was sure if he didn’t Dean would say something to piss Asher off and he didn’t think Michael’s little brother was in the mood to pull his punches.  
  
“All ready.  Let’s head out,” Sam said as he got to the passenger side of the impala.  
  
“Michael?”  
  
“Coming with left overs.”  
  
Asher smiled as the stepped over to their car and waited for his brother.  
  
“He’s right, you know?”  
  
Dean looked over at Sam with a small frown.  
  
“I know I didn’t really give you reason to think otherwise, but there were worse things than hunting things and being with my big brother.”  
  
“Yeah?”  
  
Sam shrugged.  “Other than living in a quiet little ranch house in San Jose with him, I can’t actually think of much better than it actually.”  
  
He got in the car before Dean could react but it was all they had time for really.  Michael and Asher’s arrival and new information had set them on a clear path on their hunt for the Colt and they hadn’t had any time alone yet for Sam to let Dean know what he was thinking.  
  
Dean had left himself bare the night before though and Sam knew it.  The things Dean had been trying to say, that Sam needed to hear him say, would have to wait, but Sam knew it was there and he could be patient.  
  
He’d waited years after all.  One more hunt and then he and Dean were open to a whole new world.  
  
**  
  
Dean struggled against the invisible bonds that held him and prayed that Michael and Asher had gotten away from Meg’s pets.  It wasn’t daevas this time, but more hell hounds and Dean could still remember clearly what death at their claws had felt like.  
Meg had a new body de jour, a leggy blond with a great smile and pretty blue eyes if only the soul inside wasn’t some twisted bitch.  
  
“Oh, Dean, haven’t you learned to play with others yet?  I’d hoped your time away from the hunt might have taught you to share your toys.”  
  
“You get your hands off him you filthy whore,” Dean growled out as he watched Meg sitting across his brother’s lap.  
  
“Sweetheart, I’m not the filthy one here.  Why, do you have any idea what goes on in your brother’s head?  I was there Dean, and even back then, his pretty girl barely off the barbeque, and all he could think about was what you would taste like and how your dick would feel rammed down his throat.  No, Dean, I’m not the filthy one here.”  
  
She got up and Sam’s eyes were wide in fear, though of what Dean wasn’t sure.  Was there some secret Sam was still hiding that he thought she might reveal?  Or was it because of what she’d already said?  
  
“But poor Sammy wasn’t the only one, was he Dean?”  She brought her hand up to his cheek, caressing it softly before leaning up and biting his bottom lip.  She turned to look at Sam, pressing her back against Dean’s chest.  
  
“The things your brother confessed to Sam, when Aleister had him on the rack?  He didn’t need to sell his soul to get to hell.  Oh, no Dean-o was going to hell all on his own, for thinking about his sweet little brother like that.  How old was he Dean when you first wanted to fuck him?  Fourteen?  Fifteen?”  
  
Sam’s eyes were closed and Meg laughed at what she thought was Sam’s pain.  It wasn’t the most comfortable conversation they’d had but it wasn’t the worst either and they’d already known there’d been something wrong about their relationship even back then.  
  
Dean might be having incestuous thoughts about – ok he was about to enter into an incestuous relationship with – his brother but he’d never thought they were okay or normal or something that should be condoned.  He’d lived with it for most of his life and he knew there were worse things than being in love with his brother.  
  
Meg didn’t know they’d already crossed this hurdle though and as he heard the soft shuffle of feet behind him, Dean knew he needed to distract her.  
  
“Sammy, I know she’s lying.  Just don’t listen to her, alright?”  
  
“Dean…”  
  
Everything he needed to know was right there in that one word.  The anger that Sam held, that kept him fueled during a hunt was right there on top with a steely resolve sliding just beneath it.  
  
“No, Sam, listen, she’s a demon and demons lie.  You know that.”  
  
“You … Dean … you … you did that didn’t you?”  
  
“No, Sam, I was a good brother.  I never touched you.”  
  
“But you felt it didn’t you?” Sam demanded.  “You … fuck you!  You did this to me!”  
  
The anger in Sam’s voice made Dean blanch.  He swallowed against it, knowing Sam had to be playing along but for a second there he couldn’t help but worry.  
  
“Sammy, no.  I would never hurt you.  You know that.”  
  
“Oh, he knows that, don’t you Sam?” Meg asked.  
  
Dean felt the knife at his belt pulled from its sheath by a smaller hand behind him and he strained against his bonds as Asher pulled back in case Meg noticed the soft noise.  She didn’t look back at him, but had her eyes trained on Sam.  
  
“Oh, little brother, you were so naïve.  Guess Daddy was right when he sent you packing after all.  I mean, he couldn’t have you come running back to Dean-o, could he?  Daddy couldn’t risk you running back to Dean and finding you in his arms one day, finding you in his bed one day.”  
  
“Fuck you,” Sam whispered as Meg laughed.  
  
“Oh Sam, that would be almost as dirty as those brotherly thoughts of yours.”  She turned just as she said it, hands raised to stop Asher as he was about to plunge Dean’s knife into her heart.  
  
“Nice try boys,” she said as she threw Asher back against the wall with Dean.  
  
“Yeah, it was,” Michael said as he moved around the table that was behind Sam.   Dean watched as Meg threw her head back, heard the blast from the gun as Michael pulled the trigger, and knew it was already too late.  Meg was gone.  
  
Michael held the Colt in his hand though and they were free of Meg for a little while at least.  
  
**  
  
They got back to the house late on Saturday and neither of them spoke; they just cleaned up and headed to bed.  They slept most of Sunday and ordered take-out but didn’t eat together.  
  
Sam had no idea what to do but before he could try to talk to Dean Monday morning, his brother was gone.  He left a note saying he needed to get to the store early to check in but Sam heard him on the phone with Annie the night before and knew it was Dean’s way of putting space between them.  
  
It wasn’t going the way Sam had thought it would.  In Sam’s head there was a lot more making out when they got home after the hunt and Sam finally got the chance to answer his brother’s question.  
  
Instead, Sam was off to campus to catch his office hours before beginning his first morning class and Dean was running away again.  
It was frustrating as hell, but Sam couldn’t help but wonder if Dean was freaking out a little over what Meg had revealed.  He knew his brother.  He knew Dean had to realize that Sam was aware of how far back their relationship had gotten twisted.  But had Dean realized that Sam had dealt with Jessica’s death as quickly as he had because of his twisted feelings for Dean?  Had that sickened Dean to the point he could no longer be in the same room as Sam?  
  
He couldn’t get his head around it and in the end Sam realized that was because it was all bullshit.  Dean wasn’t spending time with him because he’d put himself out on the line and was waiting for Sam’s answer.  Sam hadn’t said anything and Dean was pulling away to try to protect himself.  
  
Sam hated himself a little for letting it take so long to remember who they were, but he was resolved to making things right.  
In the end, it didn’t take much to get over it.  He had a simple plan because those were the ones least likely to go wrong and so far it had worked like a charm.  
  
When Dean got home from the store – and Annie had been more than willing to be Sam’s snitch and tell him when Dean left – he had an apple pie warming in the oven.  Sam hadn’t baked it, but just warming the store bought pie had the house smelling like cherry and Dean couldn’t help but be drawn to the kitchen where Sam was waiting.  
  
Two pieces of pie with ice cream and they were sitting in front of the living room television watching a movie together, sitting side by side on the floor.  
  
Sam caught movement out of the corner of his eye and watched as Dean took a few minutes to covertly watch Sam.  He wasn’t very subtle about it, but Sam figured Dean wasn’t entirely aware of what he was doing.  Dean could get very focused when his mind was on something and it was currently on Sam.  
  
When Sam turned his head Dean looked quickly back to the screen.  Sam decided he’d had enough of the game though and made his move.  He leaned close to Dean and swiped his brother’s lower lip with his thumb before drawing his thumb back to his mouth and sucking on it.  
  
“You had a little ice cream,” Sam said with a small smile.  
  
Dean’s eyes were wide as his gaze focused on Sam’s thumb.  He grabbed Dean’s neck with his other hand and shifted, straddling Dean’s hips and pressing their lips together before Dean was able to figure out what to do.  
  
He pressed their lips together harder and Sam reached under Dean’s shirt to feel his brother’s smooth skin.  Dean gasped at the touch and Sam took advantage and slipped his tongue between Dean’s lips.  
  
“Sammy,” Dean moaned into his mouth and Sam pulled back slightly to look at his brother’s eyes, blown black in lust.  
  
“All the way in Dean.  You said all the way in and I’m holding you to it.”  
  
Dean’s eyes went wide as he realized what Sam was saying and then his lips curved up into a beautiful smile.  
  
“You sure you know what you’re getting into Baby Boy?”  
  
Sam shivered at the nickname and Dean chuckled darkly as he buried his head in Sam’s neck.  “Gonna be so good for you Baby Boy, you’ll never want to leave me.”  
  
Sam pulled back and gripped Dean’s face between his hands.  “All in Dean, I mean it.  You and me, for the rest of our lives.  I want all of you.  I love you.  Can’t have you part time or just for a little while.  All the way, or all deals are off.”  
  
Dean laughed as he slid his hands up the back of Sam’s shirt making Sam shiver again.  “All the way.”  
  
He crushed their lips together and then Sam was held tight in his brother’s embrace.  It was everything he’d ever wanted it to be and so much more for the wait.  Dean loved him, he knew that just as he knew the sun would rise today and when Dean manhandled Sam onto his back, Sam went willingly, opening to his brother – to his lover – in every way.  
  
**  
  
“It’s about time, that’s all I’m saying.”  
  
“Hallelujah on that one,” Annie answered with a soft laugh.  
  
Dean stopped just inside the office, waiting to see what Annie was talking about out in the store.  He knew that tone in her voice and it was just mischief.  
  
“I don’t know what their real story is Annie, but it’s good to see them finally starting to trust us around here.  Four years is a long time to hide behind lies like that and it can’t be doing them any good to hold us all at bay like that.”  
  
“I agree whole heartedly, but I think it will break half of Sam’s student’s hearts when he admits to being married.”  
  
“I’m sure Dean will help him break the news.  To protect this honor,” the customer laughed.  
  
Dean had half a mind to walk out there and tell them to mind their own damn business when he felt the warmth of his brother’s body behind him, strong hands at his hips and the press of soft lips against his neck.  
  
“Might have been shocking to some folks around here though,” Annie said, though Dean could feel her searching for something.  
  
“What, finding Dean and Sam kissing like that on the back range?”  
  
Dean nearly groaned because he told Sam they shouldn’t be doing shit like that outside of their own house but Sam had an unfair advantage when it came to those sort of discussions.  Mostly in that he stopped arguing all together and just kissed Dean and there was never gonna be a day when Dean wouldn’t get lost in that.  
  
“Shocking?  We’ve been waiting for them to come out for four years, Annie.  Anyone that doesn’t want to see it has found another store to shop in, I guarantee you that.”  
  
“Guess you’re right, Andy.  You got everything you needed today, right?”  
  
Sam pulled Dean back towards the office before Dean could hear anything else.  When the door was shut, Sam pushed Dean against it and kissed him slow and steady until Dean was about ready to agree to anything so long as Sam never stopped.  
  
“Jesus, Dean, never thought I could have this,” Sam whispered against his lips.  
  
“What, Sammy?  Me?  Always had me, you know that.”  
  
Sam smiled and pulled back slightly to look Dean in the eye.  “You.  Friends.  A steady life.  This life.  No matter what we had, or could have had, I’d never trade it, Dean.  We went through hell and back and I would take it all again to be right here with you.  Love you so damn much it makes me crazy sometimes.”  
  
Dean knew his eyes had to be too big, his emotions too close to the surface for Sam to miss, but he leaned up anyway, pressing a gentle kiss to his brother’s lip.  
  
“Love you too, Baby Boy.  This life, any life where I get to be with you, I’m always going to choose that.  You got me , Sam.  For this life and any other you want.”  
  
He pressed another kiss to Sam’s lips and let Sam tilt his head back slightly to rest his temple on Dean’s forehead.  
  
“You and me, Sammy.  I’m all the way in.” 

 

 

       

**Author's Note:**

> This is an older story that was written for a challenge that never happened. I kept hold of it in case the artist wanted to finish but found it recently and decided to post.


End file.
